Who is more of an asshole?

My brother or I?

Long story short, David married a rather self-centered, world revolves around me, woe anyone who says one mean thing to me but I can say whatever I want with no consequences woman 13 yrs ago. I tried liking Heather because David is my brother. I kept thinking she'd get her head out of the clouds to become a decent person. Never happened. I really stopped caring a few years back because I had my own shit to deal with. I couldn't deal with Heather being hurt because of x or y anymore when it was obvious how her actions and words became okay with my brothers silence.

Still. He is the one who must live with her. He is the one who emasculated himself early on within their marriage. He is the one who must live with his family being fractured apart because of his wife. All of this bothers me because of how our parents have been hurt. When things have been brought to David's attention he twists the context around never accepting responsibility for his silence.

Now? I've become 'your sister'. Mom has become 'your mother'. I know this from talking with Shawn. He's still in contact with David as are our parents even though his words are different. Me? Probably won't happen until a funeral takes place which we all must attend.

Wake up and grow a pair of balls. Realize how your wife treats you and your family. Do you not think our reactions are based on how we've been treated? I know my lack of contact isn't helping the situation. Only one can't have a conversation with David where he is by himself. Where chaos isn't erupting in the background. Where one can duke things out for the good or bad.

I've given up having a relationship with my brother because I can no longer stand to see the pain he's caused mom, dad and Christina.